so apparently I need to start writing real journal entries again... see, I go through these phases and I run out of things to say after a while... and I just... don't feel like writing a lot. Not publicly, at least.

rumor has it Daniel has been considering playing the trumpet again, but nobody told me about it until he decided to back out... *fumes*... well... mayhaps it is my fault for not keeping in touch.

today is brittany's birthday... and even though she's probably forgotten this thing exists, and isn't even thinking of me today, that's okay, because you should tell people "happy birthday" on their birthday, so happy birthday. I'm not quite sure how sincere it is, since everyone says it to everyone, but that's okay.

why is it that nobody questions the sincerity of a "happy birthday," when they question everything else people say??

hmm...

'tis sad that I can't say a lot of the things I want to say... because of the nature of the things I'm thinking about... as well as the nature of some of the people that read this... put those together and there's you get this kid sitting there on the other side of the computer screen, not knowing what to say.

I don't think I've really opened up in a public manner lately. That's really too bad. There's something quasi-appealing about the vulnerability and trust involved.

robby said "that's gay" today, and automatically looked up at me and fixed what he said... that amused me, and made me happy, in a way. I don't know if people always realize saying things like that upsets people... and it shows that he actually listens to what I say.

it was interesting at lunch... the mingling of the social groups... of course jordan had to sit down in the middle of the circle with his back turned to all of the non-band people, because he's just a jerk like that...

not that it matters, because nobody tells jordan what to do anyway...

*rolls eyes/sighs*

heh... I basically just came out to tom... lol... he will talk about it... but never actually defines it... it's always "well, if it's like that, then..."

the word "bisexual" has not ever come up in a conversation between tom and I. Not even now.

sure, we've discussed gay marriage issues before, but there's no need for "bi" in that conversation...

lol.

it makes him uncomfortable, and I knew it would... but he's also doing a good job of trying not to let his discomfort change anything...

*grins*

I can understand if you think a different way than me... I just don't understand people who are malicious about their differences.

and tom is definitely not malicious.

*grins* he and sara are so cute...

lol

I wonder if this is long enough... even though it is totally pointless.

*shrugs*

maybe jazzmonkey isn't dead after all...

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